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Marriage is the moment to build a new life with a partner. The joys and sorrows will be faced together, as much as possible does not involve other parties to resolve the problem.

However, problems at home sometimes not as simple as that faced when they were dating. Not love more is needed, but commitment, to maintain the integrity of the household.

According to psychologist Prof. Dr. Sarlito Wirawan Sarwono, love is not a wedding binder. Love is just a factor that could attract someone to decide in pairs. “Love at long last three years, then disappeared. The rest is the commitment, loyalty, and responsibility, “said Prof. Sarlito, the launch of the book Preventing cheating and divorce work of the sociologist Dra Hartati Nurwijaya at Gramedia Bookstore Matraman, Jakarta.

One cause of the breakdown of households by Prof. Sarlito is infidelity. The affair itself is usually caused by several factors such as technological advances, workaholic, and possessiveness.

Advances in technology
Technology is not the origin of the affair, but could lead to infidelity. Fears that advances in technology could make a cheating partner, can make a person violates the privacy of their partner. For example, opening an e-mail, SMS, or social networking sites spouse, and even ask for any password. Habit is what according to Prof. Sarlito often triggered fights.

“Give confidence to the couple to have their own privacy area. If it turns out he’s cheating, it can be dealt with later. The point is not looking for trouble, “explains Professor of Psychology, University of Indonesia who studied this Social Psychology.

However, the technology will simplify the work and life. So, the couple had the right to enjoy it.

Workaholic
If one or both parties are too cool with each other’s work, could slowly eliminate loyalty. If the workaholic is not interspersed with both dating, for example, would be difficult for couples to survive. The marriage relationship will taste bland and feels just the same as the other routines of life. This bland taste will eventually culminate in the desire to seek a “distraction”. Who would be a “distraction” is? Most likely is a colleagues, business partners, or anyone that you normally encounter when working or move.

Possessiveness
People who always want a partner to behave in accordance with the wishes tend to make couples become bored. Domestic life becomes stiff because the couple always being watched and end up feeling cramped.

For example the issue of jealousy. Excessive jealousy can give judgments that are too fast to the pair, but infidelity is not necessarily occur. Anger that has no strong reason for it will increase the rift. Because human nature tends to always choose the better, lest you act jealous or possessive encourage couples to find someone else.

“Do not dream of changing someone, but to change yourself first, then the couple will follow,” he said.

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